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Again, shiva is a deeply personal time of reflection, coming to terms with loss and grief, and contemplating the inner spiritual dimensions of life.The workplace draws our thoughts and feelings outward, thus if at all possible, should be avoided.Others must take care of any errands or outside commitments for them.To be seen during the day in public would force one to put on a "public face" which is inappropriate during this time.Judaism provides a beautiful, structured approach to mourning that involves three stages.When followed carefully, these stages guide mourners through the tragic loss and pain and gradually ease them back into the world.The overall focus throughout the week is: I am a soul, my loved one is a soul.
Thus a memorial candle is lit in the shiva house and remains burning publicly 24 hours per day throughout the entire week.
With some exceptions, a mourner refrains from going to work during the week of shiva.
Consult your rabbi if pressing financial matters are at hand.
When you look at the candle, remember that your loved one's soul is eternal.
This thought can help bring light into the darkness in which you are now immersed.
When family, friends and neighbors help out during the week and provide for the needs of the mourners, an atmosphere of love, caring and kindness is created.